Before Manny Pacquiao gets into the ring, the male members of my family would look like this.
My brother-in-law, Jong, who is overseas, (and not in this picture) would most probably have this look, too:
(my Dad, my Husband and my four brothers before the fight of the century:)
In most Filipino families, male members are always in high spirits, before a Manny Pacquiao fight. So, when Manny’s opponent wins? Imagine the major heartbreak afterwards!
(In my family, I’d be like walking on egg shells)
How To Act Around Male Family Members When Manny Pacquiao Loses a Fight
1. That very moment when the ring announcer reads the score cards and Manny loses?
Walk slowly towards the exit and try to slip away from your male family members. DO NOT LOOK THEM IN THE EYES! ( I tried it once and I felt like Alice, falling into a rabbit hole)
2. Be affected, be very affected. Or at least act like you are.
3. Do not laugh. Do not smile. Do not whistle. Do not. Do not. Do not eat dough nuts. Do not move or better yet, FREEEEEEEEZE! ( “You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say, can and will be used against you in a court of law.”)
4. Let them huddle with other male persons in the community. Let them find their inner strength -with those of shared experiences, like in a “PacMan-Loses Anonymous”, manner.
5. Offer unlimited alcohol and pulutan, no questions asked. ( pulutan should not include chicken wings or chicken feet) (no ChickenJoy, only Champ, please.)
6. Remember to say these words with caution:
Embrace
Running
Corner
Boxing Love
Hugs
7. As for them being experts on boxing? Believe. By gods, BEEEELIEEEEVE!
8. Or when they say that Manny should have won? Yes, nalang.
9. Just listen to them quietly, as they blame every single person in Manny’s life, from Manny’s entourage, Manny’s sparring partners, Manny’s friends, ( e.g. Chavit ) down to Aling Dionisia’s lover-boyfriend.
Or blame every single object seen during the fight, like for example, Aling Dionisia’s Filipiniana costume.
10. Speak to them, like they are Manny Pacquiao themselves, by saying,
“Kaya mo or natin yan”
“Lilipas din ‘to”
“Tagay na lang”
“Kampay na”
“Bawi tayo sa susunod, papatulugun natin”
“Sige na, pahinga ka muna, stressful din yung laban, napagod ka rin”
or
“Sa susunod mo nalang ako ibili ng Birkin.”
11. Do not, EVER , at your own risk, say the following:
“Get over it”
“Move on”
“Okay lang yan”
“Aysus, para boxing lang”
12. Contrary to what most are thinking, do not do a Mayweather on them. They do not need hugs!
13. Never say,
“alam ko yung pinagdadaaanan mo”.
NO, YOU DO NOT.
14. Do not play these kinds of music in the house:
Urong-Sulong
Dayang-dayang
Chicken Dance
Nobody (Nobody But You)
Oppan Gangnam style
or worst,
Wind Beneath My Wings
15. Instead, play
Titanium
or
This Guy Is In Love With You Pare
( they somehow smile and associate this song with Mayweather and they feel better)
16. You may only play two movies in the house:
Rocky
or
That Thing Called Tadhana
( “where do broken hearts, go”)
17. Console them with:
” Sige lang, inimbitahan naman ni Sylvester Stallone si Manny, na lumabas sa Expendables, si Mayweather hindi.”
( even if you are not sure if this information was true)
18. Always assume that every male family member, considers Manny to be their one true friend.
19. When they say. ” si Manny ang dapat panalo”, it is a fact.
When they say, “Mayweather is gay, do not argue with that or with them or with your sanity.
20. Immune systems are down.
Prepare paracetamol tablets, for most likely, one of them will be running a temperature, the next day.
( last time, right after the Pacquiao-Marquez fight, my brother-in-law, Jong had a high fever, if you must know)
21. If they refuse to get out of bed or refuse to report for work, the next day, let them.
22. If they say “malas si Manny sa M, meaning , unlucky with opponents having family names starting with a letter , ” M” like Morales, Marquez or Mayweather,
just nod your head and imagine the McDonald’s logo.
23. The least you can do for the male members of your family, is like their Facebook status, not minding the cuss words mentioned on the post.
24. And last but not least, let them go through the four stages of grief:
a. In DENIAL
‘Si MANNY talaga panalo, luuuuuto!!!!!”
b. In ANGER
“Uupakan ko si Justin Bieber!”
c. In DEPRESSION
“Tapos na Si MANNY.”
d. In ACCEPTANCE and HOPE
“Meron pa yan. Rematch, rematch, rematch sa September.”
Before the fight, male members in my family be like:
“LEZZZGO GO, MAANNNNNNNY.”
BUT for now, I have to get used to,
their rants and wailing,
their pained looks,
their very far, far, far–away galaxy stares,
their brooding looks,
and their blank stares
LOLing for this one! It is like everyone is indeed very affected tlga especially your family members who are wearing t-shirts pa to show their support. Si hubby din palaging sinasabi na luto etc. Kahit sino makakasalubong namin, yung disappointment nya sa laro ang sinasabi.haha. But then again, Manny deserved to win 🙂
Hi Kareen! Yeah, hahahaha! Bilang ka pa ng mga dalawang linggo bago maka move on si husband, hahaha. The men in my family, parang binasted lang! Take care!
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