Job Interview Anecdotes

As new graduates abound, it is once again the season for job interviews.

My mom and I’s favorite job interview would always be that one episode from the tv series Regal Drama Presents: Maricel ; a drama show in the nineties.

The interviewer asked Maricel’s character,

“What makes you think you qualify for this job?”

( Supposedly, she rehearsed the answer to this question numerous times in the house, before she left for the interview….Her answer would have been : ” I possess the necessary qualifications needed for this job “)

Unfortunately she was petrified, so much so that, when the interviewer asked her once again,

“What makes you think you qualify for this job?”

All she could muster was an earth shattering,

” I am POSSESSED! “

( Hhhhhhuh, WhaaaaaaaaHH!)

I could not remember how her Interviewer reacted to that, but a Crucifix or a Priest would have been best. Anything except the job offer she wanted!

However, something of this sort, do happen in real life which in fact features my brother and I. Oh I was not present in the interview really , I was just mentioned.

My brother , ( I have four…so you have to deduce which one..) went for a job interview equipped with all the memorized answers, a job interviewee could bring along.

The interviewer happened to come from the same school that I went to, so he asked,

“So how are you related to Pier Angeli ?”

And wouldn’t that be the most welcoming ice breaker, an interviewee could hope for?

Yet, how was it , that my brother, who by the way has excellent communication skills, was taken aback with the question and with all conviction declared:
” Yes Sir, …..She is my Brother!”

( oh but I guess that was how the once little boy, perceived her ” Ate” to be. I was such a tomboy , really) But my brother hurriedly tried to redeem himself by supplying another answer ….which shall we say , made it even more confusing..)

After a flustered …”.I mean, I uhm, and I uhm …….” My brother then boldly said,

Well, Sir, I am the sister! “

( of which convent may that be , my dearest brother?)

Alright then, for equality’s sake ( my brother’s )

I volunteer three of my award-winning answers to four job interview questions:
( the fourth question was something I was not able to answer.)

My first one was during a job interview for a telecomms company; I was asked this:

“What was it you liked about your past job ?”

Hmmm, that was not so difficult at all…

In my heels, in my mini skirt, and in my Jun Encarnacion make up I confidently answered:

” Oh I was very fortunate to have been given the chance to meet different people from different walks of life in my PAST LIFE……….( err, in my past job)

For this crime, Jail term should be :

Double “Life” Sentence then Reincarnation!

I got entangled with lives there and my words got lost in that throng of people.

Oh well, Nirvana, Theravada, Mahayana, Bodhisattvas…..

The second one would be during another interview for a copy editing firm I was asked,

“Among your weaknesses which would you say contributes to your strength?”

Supposedly I was coached by a friend to answer this type of question with a positive answer always & never a negative one..

So I offered all my good qualities, all my strengths so to speak:

” Sometimes , I force my self to work too hard …etcetera, etcetera..”

But since I was known too well , to blab away, I just had to add this.. :

“…And when I am weak, I am strong , just like now, I really feel strong but ….I am weak….

Yes, it is right to assume that the next scene should be that part in the movie where someone says,

” Somebody! please call 911!” ( She is so weak!)

So after having given that kind of answer, I decided I would then make my answers short..Always!..(.Bearing in mind K.I.S.S.)( keep it short, st_ _ _ _!)

The third one was during a job interview which was for another telecoms company, I was asked this :

Q: “What do you think is good customer service”

A: “You serve your customer goods.”

Yes , you may quote me on that.

In my earnest effort to keep my answer simple , I obviously confused myself.

My fourth award-winning answer was during an interview for a Food distribution Company.

The interview went well, till the Swiss boss suddenly asked me this:

“Duuh Yawha Vaca?”

My ears were just not trained to hear this kind of accent, for it was really my first time to be interviewed by a foreign boss.

All the while really, I was answering his questions through a quick process of deduction and elimination. But ” Duuh Yawha Vaca ” was too difficult to decipher.

Just what language was that? Should I say “Qu’est-ce que tu dis?” or Que Dice?

Did he just say Vaca right there ? As in, Cow?

I racked my brains out for a good milli- seconds, combined with a milli- second prayer for a milli- second miracle…..

And God is a God of miracles.
Right on cue ,the foreign boss generously rephrased his question,

Do you drive?..( while turning an imaginary steering wheel) .How will you get to work?

Oh, so “Duuh Yawha Vaca” would just have to be “Do you have a car!”

I got the job and I stayed with them for round and about six years till I got married…

Here’s to the thousand of applicants including my younger brother and sister who would soon be going through series of job interviews, my prayers!

Do not panic.Relax.
Press button to eject interviewer…

Think happy thoughts!

n.b.

this blog post had the blessing of my brother but with out my former bosses’ knowledge, unless they followed me on facebook